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Friday, January 4, 2013

5 X-mas Movies To Feed Your Inner Holiday Demons

5 X-mas Movies To Feed Your Inner Holiday Demons! There's something genuinely creepy about Christmas based horror movies. I hate Christmas and the cold with a burning passion, but there's something about blood splattered in the snow that just revs my engine! Around X-mas we get an abundance of happy-go-lucky Santa tales, stories about love, and stories about families coming together to face the Holidays and rise above it all holding hands. Well, I don't give a fuck about any of that! I'll have some horror with my X-mas movies, thank you! That's the only reason I'll watch an X-mas movie. So here's a small collection of cheery happy Winter tales. Enjoy! 5.)Tales From The Crypt-And All Through The House(Season 1,Episode 2):

This was by far the most memorable "Tales from the crypt" for me. A lot of other scenes stuck out to me, but episode forever burnt itself into my mind. When I think about that wonderful tale telling crypt keeper I automatically play this episode back in my head. I know this technically isn't a movie, but I'm including cause I'm awesome! It's a classic! Written by Fred Dekker and directed by Robert Zemeckis this episode is full of complete insanity. Starring Mary Ellen Trainor as a beautiful lady who decides to finally off her husband and in the process gets attacked by a crazed maniac disguised as Santa. She is stuck trying to dispose of her husbands body and protect her young daughter from the creeper. Larry Drake playing the Santa killer is absolutely perfect! When I look at him I think "pedo rapist murderer"...and I watched this when I was younger so it was definitely a little unnerving. So go buy all the seasons of Tales from the crypt and pop that shit in for some family fun! 4.)Dead Of Winter/Lost Signal(Alternate title)(2007):

They changed the title to "Lost Signal" since I last saw the movie. Anyways this is a movie I REALLY appreciate! Directed by Brian McNamara the story is centered on a couple(Al Santos and Sandra McCoy) that are very much in love and out celebrating at a friends party. Problem is one of the guys at the party slips LSD in their drinks without them knowing. This is said to be based on a true story and I f'n believe it. They end up wrecking their vehicle and are stranded in the middle of nowhere in the freezing cold snow. They are not only fighting against the weather but are having hallucinations that might possibly be actual danger. I won't ruin this flick because it's way too awesome! Give it a watch! 3.)The Mothman Prophecies(2002):

This is a really fun movie to watch all by yourself in a quiet house. It's based on a mythological creature called "The Mothman". I love researching mythical creatures! There's nothing scarier than something that might exist and also sneak up on you at any given time ending in results such as this. Directed by Mark Pellington and starring Richard Gere and Laura Linney this is a flick you'll want to go straight to purchasing. 2.)Dead Snow(2009):

Written and directed by Tommy Wirkola. Nazi zombies and gore, that's all I need to say. There's not a big story behind this one. I couldn't pay attention to the first half of the movie but when the gore starts flowing it's an all out FUCKYOURFACEFEST! WOOO! And I just love nazi zombies! 1.)Black Christmas(1974):

Oh BLACK CHRISTMAS! This is hands down one of my favorite fucking movies! A sorority house gets repeatedly prank called by some major weirdo babbling nonsense and hilarious vulgarities. As the sorority sisters come up missing one by one the police attempt to trace where the calls are coming from and oh yes it gets good! Directed by Bob Clark and starring Olivia Hussey, Margot Kidder, and John Saxon.

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