Remake Rumble(My Thoughts)

So the latest,hippest trend,i'm sure you've all picked up on lately is the remake craze!They are single handedly ruining every movie i've ever loved!I'm not saying that ALL remakes are bad,but at least 99.5% of them are.Not to mention i've never seen one good remake of the japanese films that americans are butchering!
Now for instance i enjoyed the "House on haunted hill" remake.. minus a couple of the actors in it.But i loved the homage to Vincent Price,and the gore effects were great.Had this whole hallucinatory funhouse feel to it,it even trailed off from the original story,but they kept it nicely in check.Just want to throw out there,it's one to keep an eye out for.


Anyways back to the main discussion.This whole remake franchise has gotten on my last fucking nerve.Seriously most of the film makers out there shouldn't be allowed to make movies,if they don't have the creative intergrity to write one original script.It's like watching the same garbage over and over again.Looks like Hollywood is losing all it's glory.I,Myself have a million original idea's floating in my head for movies.Now everyone should be turning there eyes and full attention to the independent film scene.Because while all these corporate hollywood whores are raping every movie they can get rights too(including movies that were just released such as "Let the right one in",and "The Host").There are real film makers out there making art.This is the independent crowd.Let's go give a rundown on what's going on in the underground film world as of late...

B scream queen Debbie Rochon will be starring in two movies that i personally cannot wait to see."Won Ton Baby" and "
Slime city massacre".Also from John Lechago is coming "Bioslime".Now i watched the trailer for this movie eariler today and i couldn't believe how fabulous the effects look for a low budget flick.I urge you to go to www.bioslimethemovie.com or www.fangoria.com and watch a trailer and look up some photo stills.If your not as impressed as i am you have some serious issues.I wish people has more respect for what the real underground film makers are doing.

Well i'm actually going to have to finish this a little later,have some things to do.But until then.Cheo!

Wind Chill,2007(Movie Review)

Wind Chill (2007)
The story of two young college students (Emily Blunt and Ashton Holmes) riding together to they're destinations for Christmas.Everything gets messed up when they begin to argue and almost hit another vehicle causing them to crash in the middle of nowhere in the freezing cold weather.The girl has been quite paranoid that the guy might have premediately set up driving her after she finds out he's not from Delaware.Then you get this creepy vibe like,"wow this guy might be a stalker psycho".Darkness falls and the girl starts seeing people walking by the car she tries to talk to one and realizes this is not a living breathing human.She starts to comprehend that there’s something supernatural going on.Eventually they barricade themselves in the boys car to wait until morning to find help.But the long dark night brings many malicious and disturbed spirits to visit them.They have to fight between the blistering cold weather and the evil lurking outside the car doors they reside in.With no food,no working cell phones,no help from any living humans,and the winter chill ready to freeze them to death,they have to decide what they can do in order to survive this horror.There are more then one strange stories revealed as the night continues on.Directed by Greg Jacobs he might not have made this 87 minute movie all worth watching.
I really like the concept of this movie as it is.It would infact be very eerie to be stranded on a deserted highway in below zero weather.It would be much worse though if she had been alone,at least she had a companion.I love movies that have lot's of on screen snow,it looks beautiful.So whether they were on location or set,both looked great!The 2 main actors were very skilled at they're profession.The random supporting actors,which you don't see much of were pretty good as well.I definately think it's worth a watch for everyone.I think more people would find this movie more enjoyable then i did.So if your ever out at a video store,and you can't think of a movie you'd want to grab,it's one to pick up.
The effects were quite simple,but okay.This movie is a little too slow paced for my taste.It had to much lame dialogue for the two characters a good portion of the time.Beyond the cover there is really not much to look forward too.But Emily doing the “quotations” thing with her finger while reciting important dialogue had me laughing pretty hard.Has a handful of suspense quality that i'm sure will keep most people on edge.But i guess it's all about how easily you scare.Well there's nothing more to say about this flick.It's now up to you folks to judge.
Acting:5/5
Character Design:4/5
Story:4/5
Music:3/5
Overall Rating:3/5

Return To Sleepaway Camp,2008(Movie Review)

Return To Sleepaway Camp (2008)

Warning this review contains "Spoilers",if you would like to be surprised watch it before you read this.This is almost a re-make of the first "Sleepaway Camp".If you compare the two you'll be able to pick out all the similarities.So welcome back to another horrific stay at the freshly named, "Camp Manabe".The Sun is bright,the skies are blue,and there's yet again another killer on the loose.So we have the legendary Robert Hiltzik back to again write and direct another sleepaway camp master piece.So this story is focused on Alan (Michael Gibney) the boy at camp that everyone is prone to tease,because he's a little bit different.It seems like these kids lives revolve around what mean trick they will play on poor Alan next.Alan does rebel back to an extent,but he's just way to out numbered.The bullies pranks get so cruel that Alan runs off and vanishes into the woods towards the end of the movie.The dead bodies slowly start building up again as another camp massacre ensues.We have a little bit of everything to look forward too including..some original sleepaway camp characters played by the original actors.Welcome back Johnathan Tiersten as Ricky,Paul Deangelo as Ronnie,and the one and only Felissa Rose as the elusive Angela.There is much black humor to enjoy.And not to mention there's a bird that says,"Your ass stinks".If that doesn't grasp your attention,i don't know what will.

This movie has not let the "Sleepaway camp" style fade one bit!You have your evil camp counselors who don't listen,mean bully kids,gruesomely funny deaths,and all that Angela hype you've been missing.Robert just gives off all that original sleepaway camp vibe,but there's many new editions.The music even has the same sleepaway camp sound.Some new talent added to the character line-up is Isaac Hayes as "The Chef",coincidence?Hahaha.Then we have Vincent Pastore as "Frank",the head of the camp.There is also a lot of fresh blood introduced,getting to be in "Return to sleepaway camp" as your very first movie would be quite an honor.Robert Hiltzik is such a classic and wonderful director.There was a couple death scenes that were quite original.The ending was immaculate,it seriously brought me to tears.Oh and a word of advice,watch until after the credits.They have a little surprise at the end for everyone.

There wasn't much i disliked about this movie.I thought the scene with Randy and Linda was dragged to long.I really didn't like the sleepaway camp theme song either,but the rest of the soundtrack was sleepaway camp-esqe.Besides that it's an awesome movie.I think it's one to add to the collection for all you horror fans out there.The story is a bit unbelievable though,not all of those kids would be that mean.Same with the camp counselors,they would be fired if they were that cruel to a boy.But it's the same non believable aspects that add that much more comedy and horror.Not to mention the tagline states,"kids can be so mean"!In my eyes this movie is already an instant classic!

All Over Me,1997 (Movie Review)

All Over Me (July,16,1997)

A realistic drama exploiting teen homosexuality and how it effects them.It stares two 15 year old best friends Claude (Alison Folland) and (Tara Subkoff) living out they're teen years in New York City.Claude is soon discovering that she is very different from everyone else and has fallen desperately in love with her best friend.But Ellen has taken a completely different turn and fallen in love with drug addict street thug Mark (Cole Hauser).The film breaks in showing how close the two girls are and how they seem destined to be attached at the hips at all times,that is until Ellen starts dating Mark.Overcome by jealously and loneliness Claude is left not knowing what to do.She meets her new downstairs Rocker homosexual neighbor Luke (Pat Briggs) and they become friends.After a heated arguement between Luke and Mark at Claude's work place the pizza parlor Luke is stabbed to death that night.
After Claude finds out she gets clued in on exactly what happened that night and has to choose whether to do right or wrong to keep her friend.All the while struggling with her own homosexuality she meets lovely guitarist Lucy (Leisha Hailey) and might be falling for her as well too.This is a brilliant ride filled with such a sense of realism.Not to mention the ever amazing Wilson Cruz as Claude's co-worker Jesse who had befriended Luke and wants to find his murderer more than ever.His performance's always make me tear up he knows how to bring an auidence to their knee's with grief.If you haven't seen him in the television show "My So-Called Life",i highly suggest you look into it.I thought all these actors were absolutely perfect for they're roles.This film seems so truthfully inspired like the writer (Sylvia Sichel) was right there in they're shoes.It was also directed by her sister Alex Sichel,which i have no complaints about her either.It also takes on such a sadness to the fact that teens aroud that time really had to deal with harassment and judgement if they were any different from anyone else.
My overall opinion is i adore this film,it's more than beautiful and fun to watch.I can't wait to add a copy to my movie collection!If you don't have the money to buy a copy,i suggest you definately rent it and check it out!There's really not to much more i can say about this film,because the movie speaks for itself.
Acting:5/5
Character Designs:5/5
Story:5/5
Music:4/5
Overall Rating:5/5

Released Now,Fuck You!(My Thoughts)

Okay so something upset me a bit today.I go into Best Buy to buy my boyfriend a flick,and you know by instinct and a gravitational pull BAM i'm in the horror section.What i saw was a shocker to the max..well first off all there horror was new wave garbage including the 8 movies to die for,gobs of remakes including "Friday the 13Th" and "My bloody valentine 3-D"..etc..Alright so everyone knows how i feel about remakes i express my thoughts about every couple of minutes in psycho rants!Let's get back to my explainaton here..i look up at the top shelf and to my surprise Lucio Fulci's(My very favorite director/inspiration/idol/gave me a reason to love gore even more than i do)"Cat in the brain" and Dario Argento's "Four flies on grey velvet" are chilling there.Now let me remind you that these are the only old school movies in this entire horror section.Both priced at the ridiculous amount of $19.99.Now for all of us real classic Italian horror fans these movies were impossible for us to find.Mostly having to check online and in exchange stores to track these suckers down.I sat there just starring for a long moment at that DVD,then got pretty enraged.They are re-releasing these movies for the new wave idiot horror genere fans to pick up and exploit.I know it sounds selfish,but it really got to me.All of us real horror fans that know our shit,we found these movies with the real horror aspect and the fantastic gore,and the unforgettable scripts.We were born with this immaculate love of the horror genere,not randomly grab it off a shelf with the new release trash because we think it's a new release.I've went through long relentless ordeals to find a good portion of the movies i know and love.So i mean just coming across these movies caught me by surprise.I'm glad they'll now be easily available to people,but if your a real fan you already own them!It takes an entirely dedicated and and in general kick ass horror fan to appreciate the talent of these two masters of their genere.People have tried to imitate(especially Arengto,you'll see it in lighting in A LOT of movies) and one up them,but the matter of the fact is...THEY NEVER EVER WILL!So as i just needed to let off some well pent up steam.So for those of you devoted horror fans not in the know,i highly recommend you check out any and/or all Dario Argento and Lucio Fulci flicks.


Fulci's most well known flick "Zombi"





Argento Flicks

Cheerleader Autopsy,2003(Movie Review)

Cheerleader Autopsy (November 25,2003)


A black comedy written and directed by Stuart Dodge not for those easily offended.Begins with a college mortician student Blain Prunus (Brian D.Smith) who because of his idiot roommate gets kicked out of his dorm.With no place left to turn he flys back to his hometown to stay with his Uncle Clyde (Brian C. Smith).His Uncle is also into the Mortician business except is running an underground body selling scam to make extra cash.So he introduces his nephew into the world of making quick money,which is even easier for them because Uncle Clyde is also the sheriff of the town.A group of cheerleaders from Stinkwater going to the State finals end up in an accident that leaves them all dead.So Blain and his uncle collect all the bodies and bring them back to the morgue.It all starts to get chaotic when Wiffle (Josh Latta) a demented janitor in the mortuary becomes obsessed with wanting to be recognized through science.He's traumatized by an expirence of him losing a science fair contest in the 3rd grade and it has left him absolutely deranged.After Blain discovering the odd ball Wiffle chopping off corpse limbs a fight to the death ensues.
This movie had me laughing from beginning to end.There was slapstick horror just emanating from it.The jokes are particulary hilariously cruel,but that's really my type of humor,so i enjoyed this movie a great deal.For a low budget horror flick they did a stupendous job with everything.All of the actors were amazing and they brought originality to they're charaters.I mean those actors really had some crazy dialogue to dish out while keeping a straight face.They casted very lovely ladies to play the cheerleaders.The cinematography was also great,like i really couldn't believe some of the shots they got.This movie should be set as an example for other aspiring independent film makers.In my opinion I loved it!If your a fan of independent film making and have an open mind positively check this movie out!
Now just a little bit about the flaws,which there were not very many.The corpses and gore was not special at all.The corpses were horrible and looked exactly like blow up dolls.I would bet they wanted it to be that way for ridiculous entertainment purposes.But being me, I always love some disturbing and realistic gore.Aside from all that this is a definate original and is bound to keep your attention the whole way through!
Acting:5/5
Character Designs:5/5
Story:5/5
Music:5/5
Overall Rating:5/5

Murder Party (2007)

Murder Party (2007)
This is a great independent film of the horror/comedy genre. Written and directed by Jeremy Saulnier. This story depicts a group of art students (The Collective) who are desperate to impress Alexander (Sandy Barnett) because he says he has a huge amount of grant money. The money they all badly crave to get a jump start on their careers as artists. The saying fits here as some people will do anything for money, but viewing the movie title you should guess they go pretty far for cash. So the movie begins with anxiety ridden loner Chris (Chris Sharp) who finds an invitation on the ground entitled "Murder Party". So having no plans whatsoever he says "Why not" creates a makeshift suit of armor out of cardboard, a loaf of pumpkin bread, and heads out to his soon to be night of doom. I just want to comment that Chris's cat is absolutely precious! Such a fluffy little guy!
He arrives at a big desolate warehouse where he meets all the suspicious acting artists. After a failed attempt to murder Chris with an axe(Macon is hilarious. haha) the crew tackles him and ties him to a swivel chair. Then they wait for orders from their leader Alexander. As the night progresses the movie becomes filled with mass amounts of drugs, sex, dancing, insanity, pizza, and not to mention the word "dildo" used several times(Intentionally, I love those guys). They spend a lot of the night contemplating how they should murder Chris for their art video. But when one of the artists finally snaps, "Everyone dies"! Then the excitement boils down to Chris and the murderer face to face at an art show. This movie is way too awesome to give away any more information.
So I am really hung up on this movie. I literally couldn't direct my attention anywhere else but the t.v. screen! The story had a really original concept, and it's really difficult to find in movies nowadays. The actors were absolutely fabulous! They kept you terrified when you needed to be, and had you laughing at their hilarious antics. The dialogue was great and believable, definitely cool lines you'll find the fans quoting! Especially beautifully brutal performance by Bill (William Lacey) he is someone to look out for in future movies. The soundtrack was pretty good, a lot of clubbing music. The instrumental music was extremely intense keeps you on edge throughout the flick. About the set designs, I thought the warehouse was great! Had so many neat little contraptions in there, like the conveyor belt, and all the paths made from stacked boxes. I also love the fact that the chase scene was located on roof tops. The three characters running around on them just made it look like so much fun!
This is positively a movie to buy, I know I'm adding it to my collection. I really have no negative comments on this flick. I immensely enjoyed this black comedy! The first 10 minutes or so were a tad bit on the lagging side, but you needed that. You had to get clued in on how Chris's character lives, and how it effects the ending so well. So if you really enjoy extreme truth or dare, boobs, lot's of blood and gore, and just having a good laugh at other people's expense, then murder party is for you! Take a gander at the trailer and enjoy!
Acting:5/5
Character Design:5/5
Story:5/5
Music:4/5
Overall Rating:5/5